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Accepting Wedding Gifts Graciously
By Barbara Kelly

Many things about a wedding come from long-standing traditions, from the motions of the wedding itself to the reception. One of these traditions - giving and receiving wedding gifts - can be a source of stress for guests and hosts alike. Working out the details of giving and receiving gifts can be full of uncertainty; after all, who has been married enough times to be an expert on such things?

Everyone, however, has stories of the cousin who received an awful wedding gift, or the couple that hinted a little too much at what they wanted. A bad experience with wedding gifts on either end can sour a person’s experience at a wedding. As the host of a wedding, you have little control over what wedding gifts are given, but you are in a good position to make the gift-giving process go smoothly and without hard feelings on both sides.

Can You Control the Gifts You Get?

The short answer to the above question is no. You have little to no control over the wedding gifts you receive from your attendees. In fact, suggesting a gift directly to someone is a serious breach of etiquette; after all, how would you like to have a friend tell you to buy something for them? If you want some say in your wedding gifts, the best bet is to make a list in a bridal registry. This gives your gift-givers an idea of what you want or need, but makes it indirect, allowing your guests to pick what they feel most comfortable buying.

Being Thankful

Even if you do register with a store, sometimes someone will decide to get creative with wedding gifts and get something different, and sometimes that gift isn’t a good one. Regardless of whether you liked the gift or not, you must send a thank-you note. You should note at the wedding which gift came from which person, not so much so you know who to feel most grateful to or who to feel offended by when the gift is rotten, but because you have an obligation to write a thank-you note after the wedding.

Writing thank-you notes should be handled as soon as possible after the wedding. Although some stores sell pre-made thank-you cards, it’s most polite to write out your notes by hand; your friends and family will appreciate the personal touch. Keep in mind that you should do this whether or not you keep the gift, exchange it at the store, or plan to rewrap and send as a gift to someone else’s wedding.

If you follow these simple bits of gift-receiving etiquette and accept that the choice of gifts is beyond your control, you will have less stress over your wedding gifts and will ultimately stress your wedding guests less as well.

Author Details:
Barbara Kelly writes for a number of sites about weddings and related. You may find the following links useful: Jewelry, watches & wedding photography

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